Lucky #70 (and Dates 70-78)

I haven't blogged much about Soulja Boy, aka Eric. Since I've told about all my other dates, I wanted to see if the Good Ship Karma would maybe blow some good mojo my way if I DIDN'T write about Eric, so that's why you haven't heard from me in awhile. But I'm ready to tell the world about this guy, so here it goes:

Eric and I met at Nick's Ice House in Hattiesburg at one of my gigs with Clinton. We started chatting during the breaks, then he asked me to go to lunch with him the next day, which was really fun. The next weekend I was headed to the Coast and stopped by on my way down there and we hung out some more, then he came up Easter to see me. We've been pretty inseperable ever since. I really really like him. Eric is a good, sweet guy with a kind heart. He's from Pennsylvania, played college baseball at Westchester University, has a degree in exercise physiology, AND (this is awesome) is a massage therapist! He used to live in Washington, D.C. as a personal trainer there and always has great stories about his life there. He was also sargeant of his unit during his tour in Iraq when he joined the military after 9/11. Eric has been awarded the Purple Heart for his service in Iraq and I'm very proud of him for serving our country. He moved to Mississippi earlier in the decade for training, and as Mississippi does to those Northeners, he loved it so much he's been here ever since.

While it's only been almost 2 months since Eric and I have started seeing each other, we really like each other. He seems to care about me and has my best interest at heart. He also does little things for me, like pick me roses from the rose bush in his yard, got me a KISS lighter (y'all know how I feel about KISS!), just little things that are sweet and count. We do talk about where we are and what we want, and that's a good thing. We have great communication between us, and both of us will tell each other if things aren't fly in a New York minute.

He makes me laugh, we talk each other's heads off, he likes to dance, he's super sociable, he never lets me pay for anything, he helps me out of the car and opens doors, and I really really like him. I'm not even gonna go there and say "I hope he's the one" because, like the rest of the guys I've dated on this quest, I have to face reality and know that nothing is 100% guaranteed. However, I super duper like Eric and I'm so glad I met him. Hello, Match.com, can I have my money back? Thanks! Love, Natalie

PS: I did tell Eric about the blog and my quest for heterosexual companionship, and he absolutely LOVED the idea! He was very cool with it, and at first I wasn't gonna tell him about it, but we had a very deep yet sweet talk in my kitchen last night, and I knew it was the right time to talk to him about it. I think the funniest thing was when he said, "NOW I KNOW WHY EVERYONE IN JACKSON KNOWS WHO I AM!!" :)

Date 69-No Turning Around on This One

I am SOOO sorry to not have updated you on my dating conquests!

I had Date #69 with an engineer from Starkville. A very nice guy, but well, he was WAY too into getting married WAY TOO SOON than I was. And as Forrest Gump says, "That's all I have to say about that." :)

Date 68-Soulja Boy!!!!!

Wow! Talk about unexpected! I was singing with my good friend C last weekend in the Pine Belt, and ended up meeting a guy that night. He even called me the next morning and asked me to lunch, and we had a great time. On my way through his neck of the woods this weekend we're going out again, so I'm super excited!!!! He's in the military and is a Yankee, but I'm not holding that part against him. :) And what I like about him is that he actually PICKS UP THE PHONE AND DIALS MY NUMBER AND WE TALK. What a new concept? I love me some texting, don't get me wrong, but if you're trying to get to know someone, spoken word to me is really the only way to go.

Fingers crossed on this'en!!!!!

Date #67-Silent Night

So, this guy met me after work one night for drinks, right? I'm looking forward to it because he seems like a nice guy, etc. He shows up and doesn't say SHIT. I mean, he is quiet for the duration of the date. I hate to work at conversation. HATE IT! Every answer was a one, two, or three word answer. Then he didn't even offer to buy me a drink. I had my own money to pay for mine, but still he could've offered. It was a very weird date. He's asked me out again, but now I'M the one who's gone silent.

The Fireman and I haven't really gone out much this week. We've both been busy, so it' s been OK. I'm just kinda laying low on the whole dating thing at the moment. I've got some interested, but I'm not. Or either the guys wanting to go out are super assholes, and Lord knows I don't have time for that either.

65 & 66 - RING THE ALARM!

So, I've had 2 dates with The Flame this week. He is sooo freakin' cool. Very laid back, seems to have a good head on his shoulders, works hard, likes to have fun but is a Christian, etc. We've seem to hit it off, but I dunno. Any minute this guy could fly the coop. I'm also wondering if him or any other guy will fit into my life. I am a busy girl and if you can't hang, then you don't need to be in the picture anyway. However, I like Flame and thinks he likes me too. We're just feeling each other out I guess. He's nice though-kudos for nice guys, which are a dying breed.

Date 64 and Weirdos on Every Corner

I had a really good date with Mr. Sweetie last Monday. We went to a local sports bar and shot the breeze about our weekend, our day at work, etc. I've spoken to him via text this week, but hardly doubt we'll go out again. Just didn't crank my tractor. Nice guy though. I hope I can maintain some type of friendship with him.

So, I met this guy through a dating website, told him that I would be at a certain bar here in town if he wanted to hang out. So, he comes to the bar, doesn't introduce himself or anything. Instead, he sits back and WATCHES me the whole time. So, later on that night, he texts me telling me about what I had on, what I was doing, who I was sitting with, etc. WEIRD! So, I finally meet him last night, and he said we'd hang out later on because he was at the same party with a group of friends. Well, today he tells me that he was watching me all night, what I was doing, blah blah blah. JUST WEIRD! He's gotta go-I don't know why he feels the need to "watch" me. I'm not scared though because I'm a good 2 heads taller than him and I'll whoop him if he even attempted to mess with me.

Been busy busy with work and other stuff, so the dating has had to take a backseat to all of my other extracurricular activities. Padre and I are still friends and he's now my neighbor. We hang out all the time and I'm glad we stayed friends. But, I'm beginning to get the Tin Man Syndrome. I'm just real hard hearted right now. With the Mississippi Hippie wanting to spend all of last weekend with me and then not hearing from him in over a week, it's getting harder on the old ticker with every fleeting disappointment each guy brings along into my life. I try to use my head instead of my heart so much. My friend Charlie says that you know it's a match when both the head AND the heart agree on someone. And I couldn't agree more.

My article in the Jackson Free Press

Love is Hell (But Ain’t It Grand)

riptheskull / Dave

by Long Shot
February 10, 2010

“I just want to find my soulmate.

“Gee, I hope I find Mr. Right soon.”

"I wanna find someone who’ll follow me to the jumpin’ off place” as my friend’s grandparents used to say.

Haven’t we all been a little optimistic that maybe, just maybe, that “someone special” is out there, just for us? Our “plus one”? I guess getting older and hearing my biological clock ticking loudly, as well as seeing my once-single friends haul their Vera Wang-wearing tails into the sunset with some fabulous man in a major love whoopass (thanks, Malcolm White), I can’t help but wonder if there’s anyone for yours truly. So, in fall 2009, I began my benevolent, inconspicuous and infallible quest for heterosexual companionship.

I met a man through friends who seemed to be “intrigued” with me, and asked me out. I half-heartedly agreed to go out with him, only because it had been forever since anyone had asked me out. We met at a local restaurant franchise, where he started right out of the gate being sexually inappropriate, paying for our meal with a coupon, then saying, “There’s plenty more where these came from, darling.”

Ugh.

As soon as the date was over, I called to tell my neighbors about what a horrific night I’d had, and they invited me over with open arms and an open bar. With the suggestion of my fab neighbors, Tom and Kitty Ramsey, I decided not only would I blog about my dating misadventures, but I would set out to go on 100 dates in a calendar year and blog about every date, both the good and the bad. So far, since September 2009, I have been on 57 dates and man, what a long strange love trip it’s been.

I have met some great guys on my journey for heterosexual companionship, but have also met some real duds. For instance, I had one guy on the third date ask me if he could stick his finger in my vagina. I also had a prominent realtor in the Jackson metro area send me a video of him shaking his “hoorah stick” with his parents’ Olan Mills church directory picture in the background. I also went out with a guy who, within 15 minutes of meeting, told me about his four failed marriages, four DUIs (he got two in 2009), and his two failed stints at rehab, before trying to kiss me.

I also went out with a guy whom I thought was gay. My favorite gay friends advised me to give him the “Gay Aptitude” test (I’ll be more than happy to share this with you if we ever meet), upon which, sadly, he made a 70—barely passing by my standards, so he had to go. On my blog “A Long Shot At Love”, I even play a song for the guys that just don’t make the cut: The Gap Band’s “You Dropped The Bomb On Me.”

My quest for Mr. Right hasn’t been without some heartache. I met “Holy Grail” in October, and he totally took the wind out of my sails. He was what I call an “Educated Bubba”: he lived in the country but had a master’s degree; he can skin a deer and write a thesis. When he called it off, I was totally heartbroken. I mean, I thought he was The One. And there have been a couple of other men that I thought might be a potential suitor, but instead they gave me the dreaded “F” word speech: “let’s just be friends.”

My quest for a major love whoopass hasn’t been easy. Dating and love is both hell and grand, all in one. There’s no even keel. While getting rid of the obvious Mr. Wrongs, it’s been kind of hard to dust off my britches and get back out there after so many disappointments. After the last friend’s speech I decided I was done with trying to find a decent guy, but my friends, blog followers, and Facebook fans wouldn’t hear of me quitting and encouraged me. I am forever thankful for these newfound reluctant life coaches.

Friends ask me what I’ve learned from my whole experience, and I have to say the most important things I’ve learned is to just be yourself and trust your gut instincts when dating. No one likes fake, and if you’re putting on a dog-and-pony show just to get some poor sucker to like you, you only set yourself up for failure (done it, didn’t get the T-shirt.) Plus by being yourself, you weed out the jerks and other “sundry folk” that happen to be in the dating pool along with you.

My anthropological study has not only helped me, but I think it has helped others, too. I’ve had women and men give me some great advice while also seeking mine. My “dating panel of expertsԗmen, women, straight and gay—have been supportive and also protective of me. And I can’t tell you how awesome it is to have such a safety net of support.

Putting myself out there and being so proactive was tough at first; it still is tough. But I refuse to give up on finding the right person for me, whether it takes 100 dates or a 1,000. So, if any of you fellas out there think I’m the woman for you, holla at me. But please, baby please, no videos.